Boredom

I don’t really hate anything but I start to hate what I love for real. Hey, don’t think I’m a quitter I start with contrasts when I sit on one pole I see the other pole I jump from pole to pole this is me I change faith. Long long ago, I thought what I do I do it for a reason. Don’t take me wrong, my friend, I don’t want to hurt your feelings. You’re thanking me because that day I saved your life. Never ever try to pay it back. Don’t you know you’re dead from that day on. Didn’t you notice, from that day on, your life is a burden on you. You feel like as if my soul is in your body. You want to pay it back. Don’t you know, from day one, my life, too, is a burden on me. Don’t recommend me to take my life. My life has already been taken. Long long ago, my life was saved the same way I saved yours. I’m lifeless from that day on. From that on I pay it forward.

Back to contrasts: it reminds me my very existence. I, everyday, die and re-born. My own faith kills me when I attempt to change it. But nothing can I do. I have to change it when it gets smelly. To live I have to die first. From the dead I was raised. This is the difference between you and I. I have no worries but you.

For living, I write stories. You know my stories are full of contradictions. Never had I attempted to make my creation flawless. I just don’t see errors in the story. To see it I have jump to the other pole. But there I start to create another story that comes with its own flaws. While jumping from pole to pole, I nest all stories.

I have no reasons for the things I do. I’m suffering from boredom. Thanks to mornings and evenings, it reminds me when to change. In smoothness I don’t see pleasure. My path is rough and bumpy. When bored by everything else I then write verses – the verses that don’t rhyme. I’m sick of rhythm. I just fill blank verse with words that have no meanings. Thanks to my followers who find its meanings though. I speak a language that is spoken by no one. Don’t know why I’m still followed.

Okay! If after all, I also got followers then here is my message for you. Surrender before your thoughts. Let them take you to where they want you to. You’ll find both friends and foes. You’ll lose and you’ll win too. Don’t stick to that pole. Run away.  Doors are open to you. Run. Explore. Don’t worry about me, I assure you nostalgia will bring you back to me!