The Suicide Note

It was the first day of the fall semester. Most students had already registered for the courses, and others were still registering, or adding and dropping the courses. There were only five students registered in quantum mechanics class because the professor was very hard. No one got an A grade in his course.
The professor was about to leave for class when the door was knocked.
“The door is open. Please come in.” The professor said loudly from the inside.
A boy, breathing irregularly, entered as if escaped from jail. His shirt was half open, his eyes were red and fully open, his hair was all scattered, and holding a notebook in both of his hands tightly close to his chest.
“Here is my theory.” Without even asking permission, he sat on a chair next to the desk and abruptly put his notebook on the desk in front of the professor. “I’ve unified arts and science, please, take a look.”
The professor, who was in the middle of writing an email, raised his eyebrows and thought what to say.
“Your physics is just about feelingless particles and fields, but my theory is, in fact, a love story of the universe. Please, take a look at it. It’s in front of you.” He continued talking without a break, “The universe is…”
“Hold on. How do I know you?” The professor, who didn’t pay much attention to his notebook, interrupted. “I haven’t seen you before. Are you a new student?”
“No, I’m not your student. You can call me Siz.”
“But you hardly look 18. Where did you learn physics?”
“Knowledge is not in books, it’s out there. I directly acquired it”
The professor didn’t understand the logic. “It’s not a good time to discuss what you have done. My class is about to start.” Said the professor.
“If you do not take interest in my work, I’ll commit suicide. Yes, Prof. Praph, I’m serious.”
“Suicide. Prof. Praph.” The professor’s face turned red due to anger. “Who is Prof. Praph?”
“I call you Prof. Theorean Praph, from theorem and proof. Your work is based on theorem and proof. Your work needs proof. Mine doesn’t. My work is based on … ”
“I think it’s too much. Young man, please don’t waste my time, take your notebook, and leave.”
He took his notebook “Okay, I’m leaving, but I’m telling you I gonna jump from the top floor of your university library.” He turned around and was going to leave the office.
“Wait.” The professor was frightened. He was not sure whether it was just a threat, or he was really going to jump from the fifth floor of the library. “Okay, tell me about your work.” The professor was sweating. “Please, make it short.”
He went to the whiteboard in the professor’s office, and wrote on the top of the board;
‘“Emotional Science” is the title” he said, “of my talk.” He underlined it.
Here “But why don’t you publish your work, which is the standard way of progress in research.” The professor asked.
“There is no journal that publishes this kind of work. I put theorem and poem on the same footing. A math journal does not publish poetry, and the same is the case with a literary magazine they do not publish theorems.”
The professor didn’t argue and asked him to continue.
He gave examples. He wrote on the board;
X: 2+3
Y: 4
X: ?
Z: 5
X: !
“It is a story. Here X, Y and Z are characters, they talk in math. X asks a question. Y answers it, but X says it is wrong, then Z gives the correct answer. X says, yes, it is correct.” He explained.
The professor was listening, while also writing the email.
He then wrote on the board;
“I said to her to marry me. She neither said yes nor no.”
He remarked, “It might look to you a love story, but in fact, it is a form of logic in which there are no ‘yes’ and ‘no’.” He gave no further explanation.
“My work is also like that.” He added.
“I think we’re done here.” Said the professor. “It’s my class time now.” He sent the email, took his notes, and headed to class. “Physics doesn’t work like that. What’s your name?” “Yes Siz.” He recalled.
Siz also left the office, few steps behind the professor. He was holding his notebook in both of his hands. His arms were hanging vertically down, and knocking the notebook against his knees while walking. The professor’s office was on the second floor. When he reached the staircase, he tumbled down. He rolled down the ground floor, and abruptly sat on his bottom upon reaching the ground.
A student rushed for help if he was hurt. The student gave him a hand to stand on his feet, but he shook his head left right, to say don’t touch me. He was mute. His lips were tightly closed as if glued, and was constantly looking at his notebook, which was lying in the stairs, with a babyish look.
The student realized he needed the notebook. The student gave him the notebook.
It was 10 a.m., the busiest times of the day. The earlier class was ended, and the next class was about to start. The hallway was blocked by students, who were coming out and going into the classes.
Siz, whom no one knew, took his notebook from the student, was sitting, squeezed and frightened, in the middle of the hallway, and looking at everyone as if they were predators and he was a prey. He opened the notebook, and a pen from his pocket, and started writing.
It was interesting, a boy sitting in the middle of the halls and writing. No one knew what was going on. Some students liked it, and they started making videos.
When Siz opened his notebook, he turned over all the pages very quickly in a manner so that everyone saw it was empty. He then opened the first page and started writing. His body was all shaking as if he was having a high fever. He was writing with pauses, and nodding his head as if he was in communication with someone.
He filled out all the pages, closed the notebook, and put the pen on top of the notebook. It was very quiet in there, a place which was otherwise very loud. Students and other people were gathered around him. He was looking, while sitting, here and there through the legs of the crowd around him, to make a way to get out of there. In one direction, he found an outlet and prepared to run.
He left his notebook there and ran toward the main library. Some students followed him to videotape every single moment. He was running very fast. In the library, he took the stairs and went all the way to the fifth floor. Students used to study there.
Very quickly, on the fifth floor, he rushed toward one of the windows as if someone was chasing him. With full force, he kicked the window and jumped out of it.
The news has gone viral. Videos were shared on social media. Who that boy was. Why he killed himself. What he wrote in his notebook. Everyone was talking about it.
Police also investigated the case. They took the notebook in their possession and announced on the campus if anyone had any information about the boy, who killed himself, to contact the police.
The professor, who was named Prof. Teoran Praph by Siz, also learned about the incident. He was scared too, didn’t know what to do, but he knew he was the only source who knew something about the dead boy, and so he contacted the police.
Prof. Praph told the police about his discussion with Siz that morning. The police also asked the professor to take a look at the notebook, because they didn’t understand it.
When Prof. Praph opened the notebook, on the first page a theorem was stated:
“The universe can be understood to the fullest extent if and only if there is no god.”
The theorem was stated in a poem form.
His work contained verses and dialogues. He remarked that mathematics is poetry. To him, word choice, word count, line breaks, and the number of lines in a poem are important. From it, he obtained the values of unknowns in his theory, such as the charge of an electron.
Prof. Praph was impressed. He didn’t follow much of the poetic approach, but, at least, the fundamental constants of nature were obtained correctly, the speed of light, the gravitational constant, the Planck’s constant, ….
Emotional science, a new theory came into being. The breaking news was in the news on all TV channels. Poetic mathematics, the love story of the universe, the universe can be understood to the fullest extent, and that there is no god. What all that was. No one understood the results. The results were so clear that no one could deny it. Open problems in physics, and other sciences were solved.
Most people thought it was the end of the story, as the ultimate theory of everything was discovered, but, in fact, that was not it. On one hand, the theory looked simple, but on the other hand, it was challenging too. To understand it, one had to be a poet, a mathematician, a linguist, an artist, and much more. Who could have all these characteristics?
A new scientific era had started. All fields of knowledge were unified. Conferences were held all over the world. Scientists, writers, religious scholars, philosophers, … attended these conferences. Science fiction became the new standard. New conventions were introduced. Textbooks were revised. Theorems in mathematics were proved in a poetic way. Homework problems were redesigned. For instance, in one of the physics courses, students were asked the following question;
“In Shakespeare’s Sonnet No. 18, the first letter of each line spells out ‘STRASAABBNNWSS’. Using this word, find the mass of Higgs boson. (Hint: read the sonnet.)”
New contests were introduced. Winners were awarded huge prizes. In one of the contests, it was asked to find the total number of humans that ever existed, which was solved by one of the contestants.
In the new techniques, a question had to be followed by a question mark. And the correct answer must be followed by an exclamation mark ‘!”. But the exclamation mark in language was interchangeable with the factorial sign “!” in mathematics. It had to be used with care. The word choice, number of lines, line break, number of stanzas in a poem, … were all important.
So the number of humans was calculated by calling the exclamation mark as factorial in the problem.
Everything was fine but god. Why god was not allowed in his poetic model. Poetry does not roll out god. A poet does not prove god, he just sees him. Some people liked the idea, especially atheists were happy with that. But the problem was with those who firmly believed in religion. They found god in new forms. They recalled that the young boy, who sacrificed himself, was, in fact, guided by an angel. How he could write such a huge theory in one setting. His notebook was empty, and he was nodding his head when writing. He must have been in communication with the invisible, and, therefore, he must be a messenger of god.
But would godsend a messenger whose very message is to deny god. Did it mean that god existed but he disappeared later? Some found a solution to it, that god might be dead. Per new theories the universe is in fact the suicide note of the creator, and the universe is created from the ashes of the creator.
The creator sends messengers from time to time. Some prophets preach about him, while others deny him. The denial of god is necessary for the universe to exist. God emerges when the universe reaches its ultimate end.
But god is in pain. Takes his life again and again. Dies and emerges. He writes his story on a piece of paper. The piece of paper is in fact space and time. He folds the piece of paper several times and burns it. The fire also reaches him and takes his life.